Note to Busy Moms:
If you don’t read anything else in this post, read truth #1 (see below). There’s scripture there, and that’s where you’ll find help if you’re in a hurry. I hope you read the whole thing, but believe me, I know what it’s like to be a busy mom. God bless you!
Choosing Joy!
Changing Our Perspective For Good
A few days ago, I saw a cute embroidered cap at one of my favorite artsy retail shops. I was excited, because from a distance, it looked like something I’d wear, and I’ve been wanting a casual mom hat. But as I got closer, I was disappointed to find that the front patch read “Chasing Joy.” I let out a breath of frustration. This was a Christian establishment. Why would we, as Christians, have to “chase” joy?
I come across little phrases like this everywhere; Pinterest, Instagram, Facebook. I even hear friends say things like this. Popular little phrases like these can sound so innocent and inspiring, but if they aren’t true, they are hurting rather than helping us.
The message on the cap was a lie. Here’s what it was really saying: In order to have joy and contentment in life, it’s all up to me to make it happen. If I’m not thriving, I need to get myself together and go find what makes me fulfilled. No one’s going to do it for me. Joy doesn’t just appear out of thin air. I have to make it myself. Do you see the lie?
If you’re unsure what the lie is in that statement, don’t feel too badly. This stuff absolutely permeates our culture. It’s pernicious, and it’s everywhere. And a lot of it has even crept into our churches.
Here’s why it’s wrong: We are fundamentally incapable of producing our own joy. Read that again. Let it sink in.
Has it sunk in yet?
We can’t manufacture within ourselves the kind of lasting contentment that makes us thrive in every season of life, no matter the circumstances. Of course, there may be times when the choices we make alter our mood for the better, but true joy is not about temporary (and might I say, fluctuating) moods.
The truth is, we don’t have to “chase joy.” We can have it. Right here, right now. But how do we find it if we’re not the ones making it happen for ourselves? We choose it.
By recognizing who we are, and more importantly, who Jesus is, we can find lasting rest and joy. The truth is what sets us free. Resting in those truths allows us to grow in joy, no matter the circumstances.
There are two truths we can rest in every day. The first applies to any day or time, and the second applies to our current situation.
Truth #1 – Joy is Found in Christ!
Our joy is found in Jesus Christ, our creator and redeemer. If we look to ourselves, we will only be disappointed, because we are finite beings; but if we look to our eternal, all-powerful, loving God, we can be sure to find all we need in Him.
Psalms 16:11 says “You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
In Galatians 5:22, we learn that joy is a fruit of the Spirit. It’s a product of being rooted in God and spending time with Him. When we seek and abide with Him daily, hourly, and sometimes minute-by-minute, we grow fruit in keeping with a life dependent on His grace. And isn’t it amazing that the fruit of time spent with God is joy?!
And guess what else? Our eternal life starts by knowing Jesus! In John 17:3, Jesus speaks this of himself in a prayer to the Father: “And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.”
It’s amazing to remember that this joy found in Christ is not dependent upon living in a situation of abundance. Psalms 4:7 says “You have put more joy in my heart than [godless men] have when their grain and wine abound!”
Truth #2 – Joy Can Be Found in Our Current Situation
Because Jesus is our source of joy, we can be blessed in whatever situation He’s placed us. And this may sound cliche, but we can count our blessings. I don’t always appreciate the blessings God has placed in my life, and instead allow life’s struggles to steal my joy. If that sounds familiar, don’t worry. It’s actually not all up to us to fix ourselves. If it were, I would be in big trouble. The Holy Spirit can help us recall all that God has taught us about what He’s doing in our lives.
It’s important to remember that we were not randomly placed where we are. God has chosen a specific time and place for us in history, for the sake of His glory. Just as Esther was chosen for “such a time as this;” we are also placed specifically by God.
Acts 17:26 says God “made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, that they should seek God, and perhaps feel their way toward him and find him.”
We have been specifically placed by Jesus in the world He created! Our time and place is not random. We are here for a purpose. And that purpose is to glorify Jesus Christ!
Armed with the understanding that our purpose here is about the Gospel and not our own comfort, we can find contentment wherever we are. This life is often so hard. There is a lot of spiritual warfare, and the lies keep coming. But I have found that when I ask God for help to remember what this life is about, He is so faithful to provide all the help and focus I need. The key is to keep asking.
Bloom Where You're Planted
There’s a secondary truth to finding joy in our current situation; I call it “watering my garden.” God has entrusted me with gifts, resources and opportunities for my blessing and His glory. It’s my job to tend and steward these things. When I do, I bloom where I’m planted.
But, it’s easy to let covetousness creep in. I see other women, and their gardens seem more beautiful than mine. But I wasn’t planted there. We cannot grow in another’s garden.
I have to remember that God has blessed me with my own flowers and seeds and bit-of-earth. It sometimes takes a while for seedlings to sprout and plants to grow. But if we tend our own garden, we will grow in beauty and grace.
Let’s remember to water our gardens with God’s word and not allow our covenant eyes to become covetous eyes. The grass will be green on our side of the fence when we water and tend it.
In this endeavor to water our own gardens, gratefulness is key. But finding joy in overflowing laundry piles, dirty dishes, and screaming children seems a bit counter-intuitive. That’s because we confuse joy with happiness. We can find joy *through* those moments because we know that those things are signs of the blessings we’ve been given. Dirty laundry and messy floors are just signs I have a family to care for and a home to live in. Yes, our homes work just like the rest of the world: entropy is unfortunately a universal law for now. But we can change our attitude about it.
Change of Vocab. Change in Attitude.
For me, changing my attitude means I have to consider how to change my vocabulary. The chores are not something I “have to do,” they are something I “get to do,” or even “blessed to do.” The work God has given me is a blessing. I can choose to be joyful in it, tending my garden diligently, or I can be frustrated by it, wishing I had another lot in life.
We need the grace of God to redeem our perspective; to choose the vocabulary that befits the gifts we’ve been given. Our human nature gravitates toward negativity, but when we understand the truth about what God has given us, we can choose to remember it by the words we speak to ourselves in our internal narrative.
Let’s Sum Up!
Choosing joy takes work; it runs against our natural grain. We would like to believe that if we just work a little harder or do things a little differently, we can achieve final, lasting happiness. We could finally feel put together and at peace about everything. But joy isn’t achieved that way.
And thank God! We know deep down that we are incapable of finally fixing ourselves. We’ve tried too many times. Thank God for His grace! We don’t have to be perfect to find joy in Christ! We are saved, redeemed, and becoming conformed into His likeness.
We don’t have to have it all together. When we need help, we can “approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16) When we need wisdom, we can “ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault.” (James 1:5)
We don’t have to chase joy. We find it in Christ! He is with us. He has created and redeemed us. He has sent us His Spirit, and provided everything we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3).
We are deeply needy, and fundamentally unable to find joy within our own sinful selves. Thank God He has given us lasting joy through the provision of Himself!!
